More on Wendy's diaries

My intermittent reading of Wendy's daily diary record of her life and times has reached 1991, and my respect and admiration for her intelligence, empathy, crap-detecting capacity, ability to define the caliber and character of friends, continue to grow. Her diaries routinely record banalities like weather, household chores etc, but interspersed with this are uninhibited and perceptive remarks about many of those with whom she had daily or occasional contact. Although she tolerated fools when in their company, she let herself go in the privacy of her diary, completely confident by then that no one but she would read it. She trusted me when I told her truthfully that I never looked at her diary even though she kept it in plain sight on her desk. She berated herself for what she perceived as her own shortcomings, and in this she was her own harshest critic, finding fault with herself when I and others close to her had nothing but praise and admiration for her. She referred to me as "his nibs" when she wanted to ventilate about my misdeeds and sundry inadequacies - which she usually discussed with me face to face as well; and I'm happy to report that as the years passed and we drew closer to each other, critical comments about me became infrequent as (I like to think) I became a better person under her guidance. She was unsparing also in her remarks about her friends and other family members, recording her criticisms frankly. Her irrepressible humour shines through all. Often as I read, it's as though she is there beside me talking, which is a good enough reason for spinning out this pleasure as long as I can, continuing as I have so far, to take her diaries in small doses. She kept up her diaries when we traveled as we began to do more often from the early 80s onward, and when we got home from travels to South Asia, China, Central Europe, Scandinavia etc, she usually typed up a more detailed report that she sent to her mother and sister in New Zealand. I hope I find copies of these among the boxes of her papers that I have yet to read!

  Wendy at her desk, 34 Waverley Street, Ottawa, with a floppy hat to keep the sun out of her eyes as she writes. Her diary for 1984 is on the front left-hand corner of her desk.